Season 4, Episode 13: Pride Month, identity, and supporting your mental health – part 2
Pride Month is often centred on visibility and celebration, but many queer folks continue to face stigma, discrimination, and uncertainty.
In this episode of Living Fully, we continue the conversation with counsellor Rasha Taha, exploring how these experiences show up in everyday life, from microaggressions to more direct forms of exclusion, and their impact on mental health over time.
We also look at how curiosity, language, and awareness can reduce harm, as well as the importance of community, connection, and support in protecting mental health.
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Katherine Hurtig
Welcome to Living Fully. Each episode is a chance to talk about mental health in a way that's simple, honest, and helpful. We'll share stories, tips, and tools to help you feel supported and feel your best. I'm your host, Katherine Hurtig.
Today, I’m continuing the conversation with Rasha Taha, counsellor with Calgary Counselling Centre and Counselling Alberta, about LGBTQ+ mental health and the importance of Pride Month.
In this episode, we get into some of the more everyday experiences that can affect mental health for LGBTQ+ people. Things like subtle judgement, feeling misunderstood, microaggressions, and the pressure to fit into boxes that don’t always reflect who someone is. Rasha also talks about the importance of feeling seen and supported, whether that’s through community, representation, or finding the right counsellor fit. And Rasha shares some really thoughtful insights into how people can approach these conversations with more curiosity, less assumption, and more compassion, both during Pride Month and beyond.
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Rasha, we often talk about equality, acceptance, those kinds of things. But what are some of the real mental health challenges that LGBTQ+ people still run into?
Rasha Taha
Kind of coming back to what we originally talked about, how identity plays a part in mental health and mental health plays a part in identity.
Katherine Hurtig
Yeah.
Rasha Taha
And it's a constant back and forth. Queer and trans folks experience anxiety, depression, different challenges that people experience. And it's unique to what their experience looks like. And so, a trans person experiencing depression looks different than a cis person experiencing depression. That's coming back to each person's unique experience of their life and recognizing that, let's say, in that experience of depression, it may be unique to the discrimination that they experience as a trans person. And I think that's important to be able to vocalize that the way that folks experience society plays a big role in how their mental health is shaped. I'll put it into an example. Let's say there is a youth living out in rural Alberta somewhere, and they are contending with their identity. They realize they are trans, and they don't really have any representation around them in the town that they live in. They don't know any other trans person. They live in a relatively conservative household that hasn't really talked about different identities and being able to exist as a different gender than the one that you were assigned. That's absolutely going to impact their mental health and their perception of themselves.
Katherine Hurtig
Yeah.
Rasha Taha
It's going to play a huge part in how uncomfortable they are navigating the world. So, it goes hand in hand with shaping their mental health. And they may experience anxiety as a result of going to school and feeling uncomfortable in the body that they're in or being perceived as a gender that they're not. It's 110 per cent going to impact how they view themselves. Maybe it might lead to more anxiety, more depression, different mental health challenges that may come up for them. It's going to shape their experience.
Katherine Hurtig
And how do things like discrimination, stigma, or just, feeling misunderstood, how does that show up mentally, emotionally?
Rasha Taha
When thinking about discrimination, stigma, the word that's automatically coming to mind is a sense of rejection from society. Not being seen, not being validated for who we are, being seen as...
Katherine Hurtig
As different?
Rasha Taha
Yeah, different in a bad way.
Katherine Hurtig
Yeah.
Rasha Taha
Like, less than.
Katherine Hurtig
Yeah.
Rasha Taha
Less than human, subhuman. A different category, an element of otherness.
Katherine Hurtig
Yeah.
Rasha Taha
And I think that can lead to a plethora of mental health challenges and struggles that are going to come up.
Katherine Hurtig
Yeah. Like you said, it can show up in so many ways. I could see a lot of anger.
Rasha Taha
Yeah. And I was going in that direction of maybe folks will end up self-isolating more, not reaching out to their friends as much, not existing in the community as much, not pursuing their interests as much. And I do think it's important to acknowledge, again, it's not a matter of black and white. Oftentimes it does come up as, let's say, microaggressions throughout someone's life, throughout someone's day.
Katherine Hurtig
Do you have examples of that?
Rasha Taha
Yeah. So, it may not be they're walking out into the world and then someone outright says something deeply offensive to them.
Katherine Hurtig
Yeah.
Rasha Taha
And that is very, very direct, right? That's kind of the black and white.
Katherine Hurtig
Right.
Rasha Taha
Someone directly said something towards me that was discriminatory in nature, oppressive in nature. It can look like microaggressions at work where folks, let's say, I'm going to think of an example around someone shows up wearing clothing that people would not expect someone of that gender to wear. I'm thinking someone who presents as male to the world showing up in a skirt. That may garner some looks from people. Maybe they are looks of dissent, of rejection, of disgust, of... insert something in here. It's not something that is said, ‘Oh, that is ugly. You shouldn't wear it.’
Katherine Hurtig
Yeah.
Rasha Taha
Or whatever it may be.
Katherine Hurtig
It's more subtle? ?
Rasha Taha
Exactly. And that's kind of where microaggressions come in. It's the subtle ways that people communicate their disagreement, their judgments, their criticisms, their hatred, whatever it may be. And it's almost like death by 1,000 paper cuts.
Katherine Hurtig
Yeah.
Rasha Taha
Right? It's a small cut and it may not in that moment be all that harmful. It's still harmful. You know, it's not a gushing wound, but—
Katherine Hurtig
Over time, yeah.
Rasha Taha
Exactly.
Katherine Hurtig
Like, experiencing those over and over again.
Rasha Taha
Exactly. Because it's not just an isolated incident. Because again, if living in a society where we haven't quite gotten to a place where people get to express themselves in the way that they want, without any harassment.
Katherine Hurtig
These microaggressions, as an ally, I'd say. I mean, I never do that intentionally, obviously. Like, are there unconscious microaggressions? And if so, how would someone keep that in check?
Rasha Taha
The immediate example that came up for me is, let's say, people with disabilities, people with visible disabilities.
Katherine Hurtig
Yeah.
Rasha Taha
People in wheelchairs, or people who have missing limbs, or who visibly look like they have a disability. Oftentimes people are stared at, maybe gawked at.
Katherine Hurtig
Yeah.
Rasha Taha
And am I exempt from that? Absolutely not. But it takes conscious effort to go, ‘Nope. That is something that I'm choosing not to do.’
Katherine Hurtig
Yeah.
Rasha Taha
‘That is something that I'm not going to stare at for X amount of time. I'm going to acknowledge the person and move on.’ And so, I think it just takes deliberate practice to do that, times everyone.
Katherine Hurtig
Right.
Rasha Taha
Regardless of what people look like, regardless of how people are presenting. And I think specifically when it comes to queer and trans folks, and this is a bit more unique to trans people, what I have seen over the years in society, in community, is there's an obsession with trying to figure out what gender someone is if they are visibly trans, and it's no one's business. It's legit, no one's business.
Katherine Hurtig
Yeah.
Rasha Taha
But we're so, for some reason, there's societal level of obsession—
Katherine Hurtig
Yeah.
Rasha Taha
Around needing to figure out, ‘Was someone born with these parts, or with those parts, or with that part?’
Katherine Hurtig
Why do you think that is, like, why the obsession?
Rasha Taha
I think we tend to... We want to know. We like knowing. We want people to fit in boxes.
Katherine Hurtig
And we want to understand, yeah.
Rasha Taha
Yeah. When people don't fit in boxes then we try to fill in the blanks. But that in and of itself leads to people being stared at, gawked at, seen as different or othered. And it's not a pleasant feeling to be stared at in public.
Katherine Hurtig
Yeah.
Rasha Taha
Right? I think everyone can likely agree with that. agree with that.
Katherine Hurtig
Yeah.
Rasha Taha
But when that happens, again, death by 1,000 cuts, when that happens over, and over, and over, and over again, imagine how much courage it takes for a visibly trans person to go out into the world knowing that they're likely going to be stared at because someone is trying to figure out what parts they have.
Katherine Hurtig
Yeah.
Rasha Taha
It's ridiculous. It's absolutely ridiculous. And I like talking about this out loud because it sounds ridiculous when we talk about it out loud. It's literally no one's business. Carry on with your day and let people live, ultimately.
Katherine Hurtig
But besides checking ourselves that we're not staring, are there microaggressions that could be experienced by LGBTQ+ folks that I might not even consider or think of, but that I might be doing? Do you know what I mean? Like, I don't think it's as simple as, ‘Treat people how you want to be treated.’ Is it?
Rasha Taha
No.
Katherine Hurtig
Yeah.
Rasha Taha
No. And I think that's generally, while I think it's considered the golden rule.
Katherine Hurtig
Yeah.
Rasha Taha
I think it's the platinum rule, or a different colour rule, of, ‘Treat people the way that they want to be treated.’
Katherine Hurtig
Yeah, I've heard that one too. Yeah.
Rasha Taha
I think that's accurate.
Katherine Hurtig
Yeah. But how do you know if you don't know?
Rasha Taha
And you don't. I think the biggest thing is try not to make assumptions. And have humility.
Katherine Hurtig
Yeah.
Rasha Taha
And let go of your ego.
Katherine Hurtig
Yeah.
Rasha Taha
And if you mess up, try to be a decent person. Try to be someone who is considerate of other people's experiences. Try not to make assumptions based off of appearance.
Katherine Hurtig
Yeah.
Rasha Taha
Leave room for ambiguity and not knowing, and be OK with it.
Katherine Hurtig
And that's a tough thing.
Rasha Taha
Yeah.
Katherine Hurtig
Yeah, like, I mean, what I've learned from these conversations with you guys is that we don't like ambiguity and uncertainty.
Rasha Taha
No, we hate it.
Katherine Hurtig
And we want to understand, yeah.
Rasha Taha
And coming back to curiosity.
Katherine Hurtig
Yeah.
Rasha Taha
Being curious rather than making assumptions, right? Rather than assuming what someone's pronouns are, ask.
Katherine Hurtig
Yeah.
Rasha Taha
It's not a harmful practice to ask when you don't know.
Katherine Hurtig
Yeah.
Rasha Taha
It's respectful and it leaves a lot of room for people to feel seen and to be able to tell you how they identify, and how they would like to be seen by you. I think it's a practice that we can all benefit from. Over the last few years, there has been more acceptance of people using different pronouns.
Katherine Hurtig
Yeah.
Rasha Taha
People are putting them in their e-mail signatures. There's a lot more awareness of that, which is wonderful. And we still have work to do in terms of using those pronouns, not making assumptions on what people's genders are. There's a ton of different layers there.
Katherine Hurtig
This next question, it could apply to anyone. But what are some signs that someone might be struggling with their mental health? Yeah, some signs that they could benefit from support?
Rasha Taha
I think a big one is self-isolation.
Katherine Hurtig
Yeah.
Rasha Taha
Right? Not wanting to be out in spaces that, let's say, they typically exist in. And so, self-isolation could be a pretty big sign just across the board. I think that it can be a big indicator that something may be not quite fitting for someone——
Katherine Hurtig
Yeah.
Rasha Taha
In terms of, maybe they're at a new job that they have been struggling with because people keep misgendering them, right? And so, they show up less, they interact less with their coworkers, not wanting to put themselves out there or interact with others. That's a pretty big sign that something needs to change, something needs to shift. Whether it's HR needs to get involved, whether this person ought to find somewhere else that isn't oppressive.
Katherine Hurtig
What are some signs that someone might see in someone close to them?
Rasha Taha
I suppose, specifically for queer and trans folks, let's say someone has historically had a really vibrant gender expression, and then you notice that they start being less expressive, changing their mannerisms, changing their way of dress in a way that isn't as celebratory of who they are. I think that's a sign that we can pay attention to.
Katherine Hurtig
Yeah.
Rasha Taha
That, ‘Hey, are they having a bit of a hard time? Are they experiencing something that is leading them to feel crappy about themselves? Like, what's going on there?’ So, I think shifts in personality, shifts in expression. And similar to, let's say, someone really loving fashion and makeup. And expressing themselves through it all the time or most of the time. And then they have a bout of six months where they don't use that to express themselves. That's something that we can just be curious about, right? Maybe they're tired and they just don't feel like it.
Katherine Hurtig
Getting support for mental health if you're LGBTQ+, how can having a counsellor who shares or understands your identity, how can that make a difference in that support and feeling understood?
Rasha Taha
Yeah. And this goes back to something that I had said earlier around if you and I share the same letter in the acronym, doesn't mean we have this similar experience. And so, I think this applies here, too. That I think there is something to be said around walking into, whether it's physical or virtual, a therapy session, knowing that your counsellor is a part of the community. There can be a level of ease that comes from it, a level of almost implicit acceptance, and I put that with an asterisk because that's what it should be. It's not always what it is.
Katherine Hurtig
Right, yeah. My assumption is that there's at least a bit of groundwork already done.
Rasha Taha
Yeah.
Katherine Hurtig
Like, you don't have to explain certain things because there is that understanding.
Rasha Taha
Yeah.
Katherine Hurtig
Yeah?
Rasha Taha
And at the same time, acknowledging and recognizing that people still make mistakes, and people still misspeak, and may not be up to speed on the most up-to-date language. So, I think this is both the role of a counsellor and a client of walking in with some element of humility, and the counsellor having also humility of, ‘Hey, just because we're both particular subcategory of the queer community, doesn't mean we have shared the exact same lived experience.’
Katherine Hurtig
Yeah.
Rasha Taha
I think it's helpful for clients to also know that there can be this level of implicit acceptance, but it's also not always a given, unfortunately. Like, I've had some queer counsellors that have been a terrible fit for me.
Katherine Hurtig
Yeah, yeah.
Rasha Taha
Right? It's kind of like saying, ‘Hey, just because we both fall into the same community means you're going to be a good fit, means you're going to be respectful, means X, Y, Z.’
Katherine Hurtig
Right.
Rasha Taha
So, we want to avoid that catch-all understanding.
Katherine Hurtig
Yeah, like if someone is LGBTQ+ looking for counselling, like you're recommending that you don't always have to go for someone who's also LGBTQ+?
Rasha Taha
Yeah. And I have appreciated it when I have known that my counsellor is also queer.
Katherine Hurtig
Yeah.
Rasha Taha
Knowing that... It's more so for me.
Katherine Hurtig
Yeah.
Rasha Taha
It's for me, in terms of I feel seen knowing that I am in this space, but I also can't expect them to know everything.
Katherine Hurtig
Yeah, for sure.
Rasha Taha
And I can't expect them to understand my experience right off the bat. I still have work to do there.
Katherine Hurtig
Yeah.
Rasha Taha
And they're still allowed to ask questions. They're still allowed to be curious about what my experience looks like. It's not... I can't walk in assuming that they get it all.
Katherine Hurtig
Yeah.
Rasha Taha
Because no one can, whether they're queer or not.
Katherine Hurtig
You know, it's a comfort level thing because, I mean, I've had a lot of counselling experience in my life, and I always gravitate towards women. But again, in my conversations with you guys I’ve realized, who knows?
Rasha Taha
Yeah.
Katherine Hurtig
Maybe if I had a counsellor of another gender, the experience could have been different.
Rasha Taha
Yeah.
Katherine Hurtig
It might have given me different insight. We do like our comfort zone and think like, ‘This person is like me so they will understand.’ But that might be cutting ourselves off from other helpful perspectives.
Rasha Taha
There's a lot of accuracy and validity in what you just described that, yeah, there can be a level of comfort, and we can also benefit from having different perspectives.
Katherine Hurtig
Yeah.
Rasha Taha
What I truly value about us here at CCC is that we have a wide variety of folks of different walks of life. And so, if folks do want to see someone within the community, within a community of their preference, we're going to try our best to match them up with that. If that's something that they have vocalized.
Katherine Hurtig
Yeah.
Rasha Taha
And we don't get to decide for them their level of comfort of why they're choosing it.
Katherine Hurtig
Well, and that's something we know. Like, one of the biggest factors for counselling being successful is that connection you feel with your counsellor.
Rasha Taha
Yeah.
Katherine Hurtig
Like, that fit.
Rasha Taha
Absolutely.
Katherine Hurtig
And if it's not there, it's just not going to be as good of an experience. And that's the thing, I think we have a hard time giving that feedback or kind of saying like, ‘Yeah, I don't think this is a good fit.’ We need to encourage people, especially any clients that come to Calgary Counselling Centre or Counselling Alberta, that we have so many counsellors.
Rasha Taha
Yeah.
Katherine Hurtig
So, if there’s someone you see for the first couple times, you're not feeling it, you can ask to switch.
Rasha Taha
Yeah, absolutely.
Katherine Hurtig
Yeah. If someone doesn't have a counsellor that fits into their similar lived experience, what else can help them still feel understood in counselling?
Rasha Taha
I think vocalizing what it is that they might need from the counsellor. ‘Hey, I like it when you tell me things direct.’
Katherine Hurtig
Yeah.
Rasha Taha
Right? ‘Don't sugarcoat it, just tell it to me as it is.’ Or, ‘Hey, I actually really appreciate a softer approach.’
Katherine Hurtig
Yeah.
Rasha Taha
‘Please sugarcoat it because it helps me process it.’
Katherine Hurtig
Yeah.
Rasha Taha
Clients having an idea of how they like to receive support and how they like to receive feedback, how they like to be asked questions, is always a helpful place to start from. Let's say clients feel like a particular area of their life/lived experience is so unique to them, and they feel like it's important for their counsellor to know about it. Come in and ask your counsellor to do their research. That's OK.
Katherine Hurtig
Yeah, like you said, you don't want to have to explain it all the time. So, put that on someone else.
Rasha Taha
Yeah.
Katherine Hurtig
Like, yeah, do your own research.
Rasha Taha
Yeah, exactly. And so again, this is where we get to leave a little bit of room. Let's say client mentions identity X and counsellor goes, ‘You know, I'm not super familiar with identity X, but it's something I'm going to look into for the next time that we meet together.’ Right? That's the counsellor's job to do that.
Katherine Hurtig
Yeah.
Rasha Taha
And it could be about anything.
Katherine Hurtig
To have more of that understanding.
Rasha Taha
Yeah, exactly. We all have a lot of room to grow and learn, and we're not going to know every single identity, every single thing.
Katherine Hurtig
Yeah.
Rasha Taha
It's literally unrealistic.
Katherine Hurtig
Yeah.
Rasha Taha
And so, this is where kind of humility comes in, and clients recognizing that counsellors are human, and they're not walking encyclopedias. It would be nice if we could be. But leaving room for counsellors to recognize their limitations.
Katherine Hurtig
Yeah.
Rasha Taha
And try to do something about it.
Katherine Hurtig
Rasha, how important is community and having your people? How important is that when it comes to mental health and supporting someone's mental health?
Rasha Taha
I think it is of the utmost importance in general. But I think specifically when it comes to queer and trans folks, I think knowing that there are other folks who share bits and pieces of your identity, other folks who are also expressing themselves in the ways that make sense to them. I think the solidarity there can be massive.
Katherine Hurtig
Yeah, just having other people who get it.
Rasha Taha
Exactly. Feeling seen, feeling heard, not having to explain your existence to others. Again, that ease of it. But also, being able to learn from other people.
Katherine Hurtig
Yeah.
Rasha Taha
I have absolutely learned so much about myself through being immersed in queer community because then I'm exposed to different facets of the community, of different identities. So, I think it's important in that respect. But I also think representation really matters. Having queer and trans folks exist in all different facets of life. Seeing them at the grocery store, seeing them in government, seeing them in different positions of power, in businesses, in whatever it may be, that visibility and that representation normalizes the existence of those identities and the way that people express themselves.
Katherine Hurtig
For sure.
Rasha Taha
And again, just makes it a normal part of day-to-day life. It’s not something that is unusual, it’s not something that is weird or a one-off.
Katherine Hurtig
They belong where anyone else does.
Rasha Taha
Yeah, exactly.
Katherine Hurtig
Yeah. If you don't have that group, if you don't have that support system, what are some ways that you can begin to build connection and find those supportive spaces?
Rasha Taha
The internet is a wonderful place. It can be a terrible place for others.
Katherine Hurtig
Yeah.
Rasha Taha
But I think in terms of being able to find different resources, there are so many different groups that are, let's say, across Canada, that are across Alberta, that are across the world, that you can hop in on, that run different meetups, whether it's in person or virtual. So, I think it really is a matter of finding different resources. And this could be something that your counsellor possibly helps you with.
Katherine Hurtig
OK.
Rasha Taha
If you're not too sure where to look, you can bring in your counsellor and go, ‘Hey, I'm wanting to do XYZ. Can you help me with this research?’ And maybe they're connected, your counsellor is connected to the community in a way that you aren't, or you didn't know of. And so, they can find you different resources. So, I think it really is a matter of putting yourself out there in order to make those connections and recognizing it's not going to happen overnight. It's something that we experience over a period of time and people.
Katherine Hurtig
Yeah, building community, it takes time for sure.
Rasha Taha
Yeah. And it changes. Community is always in flux. I think that's why I say it's an ongoing process because it's not like we find community and then that's it. It's the same as we don't just come out and then that's it.
Katherine Hurtig
Right, yeah.
Rasha Taha
It's really tempting for us to think of these things in that way. But I think there's so much freedom in knowing that these things are always in flux. There are always opportunities to step in, to take a step back, to shift, to change. Yes, it's not an on and off switch. There's so much beauty in the transitions.
Katherine Hurtig
Yeah.
Rasha Taha
And in the constant changes that can come in. It presents us with a lot of opportunities that may not have existed if things were just static.
Katherine Hurtig
Right. So, as we've been talking, we have kind of said there has been meaningful progress when it comes to rights and visibility, awareness, representation. How do you see that progress impacting mental health today?
Rasha Taha
I think it can bring quite a bit of comfort, especially for people who have been, let's say, around to recognize how far we have come is a milestone in and of itself. When things were popping off in the 1970s, right? Like, that's not that long ago.
Katherine Hurtig
Yeah.
Rasha Taha
Right? And we have made quite a bit of progress since then. And there have been quite a few attempts to take us backwards.
Katherine Hurtig
Yeah, I was just going to say, like, I mean...
Rasha Taha
It's not always just a trudging forward.
Katherine Hurtig
Yeah, progress isn't linear.
Rasha Taha
Yeah.
Katherine Hurtig
So, how do we cope with that kind of one step forward, two steps back thing?
Rasha Taha
I think it's a delicate balance of recognizing that, yes, there have been people that have come before us that have had to fight really hard in order for us to get here. And there are still people here today who are impacted in a really, really big way by the two steps back.
Katherine Hurtig
Yeah.
Rasha Taha
Let's say legislation or laws that are being tried to pass around trans folks' access to health care. Those are very dangerous things that deeply impact people's lives.
Katherine Hurtig
Yeah.
Rasha Taha
Specifically, youth. Youth who don't have access to gender-affirming care are more likely to experience mental health challenges. The statistic is out there.
Katherine Hurtig
Yeah.
Rasha Taha
That is a thing, that youth are at increased risk for if they are not able to access gender-affirming care, if they don't have supportive families. If these very basic things are not at their disposal, they're not things that they're able to access.
Katherine Hurtig
You know, especially the last few years, there's a lot of public and political conversations about LGBTQ+. How are you seeing that affecting people? How are you seeing that affect your clients?
Rasha Taha
There's quite a bit of fear.
Katherine Hurtig
Yeah.
Rasha Taha
There is definitely quite a bit of fear around, ‘How long am I going to be able to access this thing or that thing before it gets taken away?’ And so, on the counsellor's part, it's OK, recognizing that it is fear, and its valid fear, and still trying to ground ourselves in the right now, rather than in possibly catastrophizing.
Katherine Hurtig
Yeah.
Rasha Taha
Or in future-telling, in the what ifs. Again, another delicate balance of where are we now and what may be coming down the pipeline that may impact us. And how do we gently engage in some element of problem solving so that we can try to manage that anxiety in a way that is going to make sense but isn't going to kind of propel us into the future, into being anxious all the time about what's coming up. So, it's an element of recognizing where are we now, what do we have access to now, how can we prepare in a way that isn't going to increase our anxiety for what may be coming down.
Katherine Hurtig
You and I have had conversations about the idea of holding different emotions at the same time. How do we hold both hope and discouragement at the same time?
Rasha Taha
Yeah. We all at some point in time have had to do that. We need to recognize that there's, you know, the micro, meso, macro scales. What can I do on a micro scale? What can I impact on maybe the meso scale? If you do have access to lots of people, if you have access to different communities, how can you maybe contribute through donations, through volunteering your time? How to try to offset that hopelessness?
Katherine Hurtig
Yeah.
Rasha Taha
Oftentimes, I find that the hopelessness can come at the heels of feeling like, ‘I have no control.’
Katherine Hurtig
Yeah.
Rasha Taha
And so oftentimes what shows up in session is, ‘OK, how can we have control over the things that we have control over and be able to move the needle a little bit to feel a little bit more hope in what's going on in the world.’ So, maybe you're feeling particularly hopeless about thing X that's happening over there, but you aren't able to volunteer your time or you're not able to physically be there in order to help with thing X. OK, let's think about what are other ways that you can help. Is it a matter of raising awareness? Is it a matter of financial donation? Is it a matter of getting creative, thinking outside the box? Reading up on things, like everyone's going to have their own way of trying to counter some of that hopelessness—
Katherine Hurtig
Yeah.
Rasha Taha
By leaning on, ‘What do I, as one person in this world, what can I have control over so that I can access a little bit more hope?’
Katherine Hurtig
Where do you see hope in LGBTQ+ communities right now?
Rasha Taha
We have existed for far longer than most people give us credit for. We have existed for as long as humans have been existing.
Katherine Hurtig
Yeah.
Rasha Taha
We've been around this whole time. Queer and trans folks are incredibly resilient. They're incredibly creative, and they have been surviving for eons. It's really paramount to acknowledge that we have always found ways to continue existing despite oppression, despite discrimination, despite real threat and violence. Just by folks being themselves. I see that as a source of hope.
Katherine Hurtig
Yeah.
Rasha Taha
By them, even if they're not out to the world, if they're out to themselves, or if it's something that they're questioning, or something that they're talking about, or even when it comes to allies talking about their queer and trans friends, normalizing it. I think it's all part of that movement and it all instills hope in that queer and trans folks aren't beneath the surface, they're not in hiding, they're not seen as less than. We're trying to elevate their voices. We're trying to make sure that folks know that we exist, we have always existed, and we will continue to exist. And I think that in and of itself is hope.
Katherine Hurtig
For sure. For someone who's struggling, what are some small, realistic ways that they can take care of their mental health?
Rasha Taha
Reaching out. Talk to your counsellor. Talk to your friends. Be in community. Don't struggle alone. There's no gold medal for struggling on your own.
Katherine Hurtig
Yeah.
Rasha Taha
We don't need to. I encourage folks to even reach out to one person to be able to talk to them about what's going on. And that could be an anonymous person online that you meet in a queer-friendly forum. It could be as simple as that, and I think we can find quite a bit of validation and comfort in not struggling alone.
Katherine Hurtig
And for listeners who want to be more supportive, whether they're part of the LGBTQ+ community or they're allies, what are some meaningful ways to show up?
Rasha Taha
I think specifically when it comes to Pride Month, engage in the festivities, and the fun, and the parties, and also engage in other aspects of Pride. Whether it's volunteering your time, whether it's donating, whether it's talking to your co-workers more about it, whether it's educating yourself. I would encourage people to go beyond the celebratory piece and make it maybe a fun challenge for you to learn about something that you haven't learned. Maybe it's queer history that you want to look into or maybe it's, ‘What are some of the Indigenous ways of existing as a two-spirit person?’ Right?
Katherine Hurtig
Yeah.
Rasha Taha
Like, there's so many different things that we can learn, and I think it can be a fun way of engaging in Pride Month is just increasing our awareness and our understanding of different identities.
Katherine Hurtig
Thank you, thank you, Rasha. This has been an amazing conversation.
Rasha Taha
Yeah.
Katherine Hurtig
Yeah, I've learned so much and I'm going to take away a lot from this.
Rasha Taha
Thank you. Likewise.
Katherine Hurtig
You've been listening to Living Fully, a Calgary Counselling Centre podcast. Thank you for tuning in.
This episode was produced by Layla Ruggles, Luiza Campos, Julianna Adair, Jenna Forbes, and by me, Katherine Hurtig. A special thanks to Rasha Taha.
Living Fully will be taking a bit of a break over the summer, but we’ll be back with more episodes starting September 1st.
To stay up to date on our latest episodes, be sure to subscribe. We're available in your favourite podcast app. Living Fully is a production of Calgary Counselling Centre and recorded in Calgary on Treaty 7 territory. Living Fully podcast is not a substitute or alternative for professional care or treatment. Calgary Counselling Centre and Counselling Alberta provide effective counselling to anyone in Alberta with no wait list and no financial barriers. Find us online at calgarycounselling.com and counsellingalberta.com. For help across Canada and the United States, call 211. If you are outside of Canada and the U.S., seek help from your general medical practitioner.