From difficulties experiencing joy to struggling to get out of bed, it is estimated that one in five Canadians will experience depression at some point in their life. It can impact anyone – and that includes children and teens.

While it may be common, depression is also one of the most treatable mental health challenges – and the sooner one seeks help, the better the results can be.

In Calgary on average, four to eight teenagers are depressed in every classroom. But only one or two of those kids are getting help. Do you know the signs your child may be struggling?

The signs of adolescent depression

Not all people experience and show depression symptoms the same way. The same can be said about youth facing this challenge. Children especially tend to express depression in more subtle ways than adults.

Some common signs are:

• A noticeable increase in irritability

• Changes in diet

• A drop in grades and participation at school

• Losing passion for their favourite activities

• Avoiding social gatherings with family and friends

It is important to note that if your child exhibits one or more of these signs, it does not necessarily mean they have depression. Depression would persist over several weeks or months and can vary in the ways it impacts individuals, especially children. However, it is still important to keep note of your children's life and mental health, whether or not they appear to be struggling. If you are concerned, know that your child does not need a formal diagnosis of depression to get help for what they’re going through.

Potential causes of depression in children and teens

There are many reasons why depression may find a way into a child’s life. Common personal struggles that can lead to depression in youth are:

• Bullying

• Struggles in classes

• Physical injuries

• Chronic health challenges

• A lack of social interaction

• Traumatizing events

But no matter how depression may have begun, there are a few key dos and don’ts to help your child tackle this difficult period.

Connect rather than correct

The most important aspect from a parent’s perspective is to help your child or teen recognize what they’re dealing with is nothing to be ashamed of. It can be common for both children and even adults to view themselves as ‘the problem.’ Let your child know that it’s normal for everyone to experience emotions like these – even adults.

This is where it becomes important to connect rather than correct and be there for your child as they navigate this challenge.

As a parent, your instinct may be to attempt to solve the problem yourself when you suspect something is wrong. While it may be tempting to try to correct what you think may be causing the challenge for your child, it is much more important to connect with them.

Connecting means doing something with your child rather than getting them to do something. Relating and helping your child to find coping tools that work for them is much more effective than attempting to fix the problem yourself.

Ways to connect and talk with your child about depression

While it may seem intimidating to discuss this tough topic, there are a lot of safe and respectful ways to initiate these conversations with your children.

Don’t be afraid to let your child know you’ve noticed a development in new or unusual behavior. This could be through a conversation in private space, or after a personal activity they enjoy. These could involve taking a walk, playing a backyard sport together, or going out for ice cream.

Perhaps most importantly, let your child know that what they’re dealing with is not something to fear or be ashamed of. These emotions are normal and it’s important to let children know you’re alongside them and will be there to support.

Other ways to help your child connect

If your child doesn’t feel comfortable talking to you about what they’re going through, offer to arrange a time in which they could speak with someone they may be more open to sharing with.

Respectfully bring up the idea of talking with a counsellor. Counselling gives your child a safe and confidential space to discuss their struggles with someone who has the training and experience on how to help. Counselling also offers personalized strategies and approaches to help each child work through their specific challenges.

Even if they often say no to these invitations, it is important to always offer them a space to discuss anything that may be worrying them.

The most important thing you as a parent can do is to connect with your child. Acknowledge their struggles and offer them options.

If you or your child need help, we’re here for you. Learn more about how counselling can be an effective tool to help your child.

Information for this blog post was provided by registered social workers, Claire Fan and Joel Zimmerman. Learn more about our counsellors.