Navigating the holiday hustle: tips for managing time and family obligations

family together for the holidays setting healthy expectations

The holiday season is a time of joy, celebration, and togetherness. However, it often brings its own set of challenges that can lead to feelings of anxiety, especially when faced with time pressures and the weight of family obligations. Balancing the demands of the season while maintaining your emotional well-being is crucial. While this time of year can feel overwhelming, it’s important to remember that there are different strategies you can use to help navigate the holiday hustle and prioritize your mental health. Tools like managing expectations, setting boundaries, and embracing change can help make the holidays feel more fulfilling and less stressful.

Below are some practical ways to help you navigate the holiday season and make it more enjoyable, while also protecting your mental health.

Set realistic expectations

One of the main sources of stress during the holidays often comes from unrealistic expectations and the pressure to continue traditions. With so many conflicting obligations, the season can begin to feel overwhelming. Whether you dream about hosting the perfect gathering, finding the ideal gift, continuing a family tradition, or attending every event, it's essential to set realistic expectations for yourself. Remind yourself that perfection is unattainable, and it's okay if things don't go exactly as planned.

To help manage the stress of expectations, take a minute to recognize and acknowledge your feelings. By identifying feelings of discomfort and allowing them to exist without acting on them, you can build tolerance and shift your focus away from negative thoughts. For example, acknowledge when you feel your heart racing or hands sweating from stress, and say to yourself, “I’m feeling overwhelmed, and that’s okay.” The more that you can recognize your feelings and where they come from, the easier it will be to build your tolerance for uncomfortable situations and move on to something else.

family talking at a holiday dinner setting healthy boundaries

Set boundaries

Setting boundaries is another effective strategy for managing expectations. When setting boundaries, it’s important to have a strong understanding of your personal values because they’ll help you decide what to say yes or no to when navigating family plans during the holidays. Remember that it’s okay if you value something different than your family. Try framing your thoughts as, “my family values this, and I value that, and that’s okay.” After setting a boundary you may get some pushback from family or friends. It’s important that you respectfully communicate and reinforce your boundaries. It can be hard to assert yourself and reinforce your boundaries, if you need help counselling can be a great way to learn these skills.

Learn to say no

With so many different events happening throughout the holiday season, it can feel impossible to attend everything. Know that it’s okay to decline invitations or added responsibilities if you feel stretched thin. Recognize your limits and say no if you’re feeling overwhelmed. Saying no doesn’t mean that you don’t care; it means that you’re prioritizing your mental well-being.

Another way to help alleviate some of the time pressures is by embracing flexibility. When you have a big family and social circle, it can be hard to find the time to see everyone over the holidays. Try suggesting that some events be moved to January, as this will ensure that everyone still spends time together and connects, but with less stress and time constraints.

Communicate openly

happy family eating holiday meal

Being open and honest about your needs and feelings is key, especially when it comes to managing family and friend obligations. Discuss expectations, delegate tasks, and work together to create a plan that accommodates everyone. Remember that the holidays don’t need to be perfect, and most of the time they aren’t. Talking about how you’re feeling and being honest about your limitations can prevent misunderstandings and reduce unnecessary stress, so that you can focus on making those special holiday memories- even if that looks different than you originally imagined.

Prioritize self-care

Amid the chaos of the holiday season, don't forget to prioritize self-care. Schedule time for activities that bring you joy and relaxation. This could include meditation, reading, taking a walk, or simply enjoying a quiet moment alone. Taking care of your mental health is not a selfish act; it's a necessary step to ensure you have the energy and resilience to fulfill your holiday obligations.

As you navigate the holiday season, remember that your mental health is important. By setting realistic expectations, communicating openly, setting boundaries, you can manage time pressures and family obligations more effectively. This holiday season, let go of the idea that everything needs to be picture-perfect like we see in the movies, and instead focus on creating meaningful memories and nurturing your well-being.

For more information on how to manage holiday stress, listen to our latest podcast episode of Living Fully, with registered psychologist, Amy Ramler. If you’re still struggling with the weight of holiday pressures, we’re here to help. Calgary Counselling Centre offers counselling with no waitlists and fees are based on a sliding scale, so that you can get the support you need.


Information for this blog post was provided by registered psychologist, Amy Ramler. Learn more about our counsellors.

Blogadminholidays, anxiety, self care