“I was left with nowhere to go but up”

“The first signs of anxiety appeared when my marriage began to fall apart.  The struggles in my marriage only got worse through my pregnancy. After our baby girl was born me and my husband separated, which sent my life spiraling into confusion. In the midst of this confusion, I was also laid off.  I was a single mother with no job. The plans and expectations that I had for my life were suddenly in pieces – pieces that I somehow had to reassemble for both my daughter’s and my own well-being.

“A few years ago I would have never pictured myself suffering from extreme anxiety. I have always been a positive person – some might have even described me as outgoing. Those aspects of my personality were lost in a sea of negative thoughts. I was living in fear of how vulnerable I was and felt helpless and alone.

“I started building walls up around my mind. I trapped all of my negative thoughts inside to protect myself and avoid creating a negative environment for everyone around me, especially my daughter. In doing so, I eventually became emotionally exhausted.

“I knew I needed to create an outlet for my anxiety so I could change my pessimistic thoughts into positive ones. A few of my family and friends attended counselling in the past, and shared their success stories with me to inspire me to go. Yet, I was in denial of what I was experiencing. I still thought that I could fix the situation on my own.

“It took incentive for me to finally go for counselling — the realization that I had reached rock bottom was my personal push. I was left with nowhere to go but up. I finally realized that I couldn’t get better on my own.

“If I had known of the benefits that counselling would have given me, I would have taken the leap of faith sooner. My counsellor was nothing short of exceptional. She helped me breakdown my walls and had an easiness about her that made me feel I could really open up and share my thoughts and feelings. She taught me how to be comfortable and self-aware. I gained confidence in my abilities and a sense of myself back, which I had lost.

“I attended counselling for approximately four and a half months and attended both individual and group sessions. While the individual sessions let me express myself to a person who understood, the group sessions helped me connect with others who were experiencing the same feelings. I was sitting in a room full of strangers, yet could relate to every single person in that group.

“Counselling helped me change my sense of self and has shaped me into a person I never thought I could be.

“As tough as the first step might be, you have to keep in mind that you will get something out of it.

“Change starts with you.”

Kumari